A Body:

Her parents were Jeovah’s Witnesses but when she was 4, her dad, who was fond of drinking, left the religion. After he was diagnosed with amyotrophic lateral sclerosis (ALS), she'd always follow him to the bar, for he struggled to count the money. She recalls listening to the adults talking and seeing her dad having a good time. He passed away at the age of 57, after a year and a half of struggling with the disease and lacking the resources for appropriate treatment, leaving his 11 years old daughter, her sister and mother devastated.

Left alone with the girls, and receiving a salary from the government on behalf of the deceased husband, her mom struggled to make ends meet, which led to a downward spiral of debt and consecutive loans. Not only to provide for the family, but often to indulge in an inconsequent shopping spree. As a result she deprived her daughters from having a healthy adolescence as they couldn’t afford going out or buying clothes they liked or even needed.

Poverty and religion assured she’d grow up apart from the usual teenager vanities. A condition she reinforced years later after being hired as assistant train driver at 24. In order to adapt to a heavily masculine environment and avoid abuse, she dressed and acted like the men she worked with. After a short period as assistant, she was promoted to train driver, becoming the first female cargo train driver of the state.

Under her over protective mother’s thumb in a conservative religious circle, she was forbidden to work, date, or hang out with people outside her church. Never masturbated until 28 years old and had her first kiss at 29. Those two acts, taken for granted to most people, felt like breaking out of prison. Questioning the need for Jeovah’s Witness strict rules, she left the church, opening herself to life and new possibilities, including the first orgasm, an event she’s eager to experience before turning 34 next year.

A Dream:
Escape from society and live in the countryside

A Regret:
Not putting herself as a priority

BDR #11
a body, a dream, a regret.
A photojournalistic series in 52 chapters by Victor Ribeiro.