I tend to shy away from sensuality or sexiness. Growing up, they were heavily shamed in my household. My parents conditioned me to believe that femininity and sex appeal were negative and dirty. Whenever I was in a situation where I could show my sensual side, I felt awkward and uncomfortable. As I got older, I realized that while modesty is fantastic, there is nothing wrong with unleashing your sexy side now and then (or as often as you want!) Many young girls, especially BIPOC girls, are hypersexualized and shamed for things out of their control, such as having curvy bodies at young ages. And the media portrays women who embrace their sex appeal as either stuck up or whores. So there are women, like me, who are not only uncomfortable with their sexuality but unfamiliar with it.

Shenseea released a female dancehall song called “Be Good” and opened up a challenge for dancers to choreograph to it. I decided to hop on the challenge and allow myself to be in the moment. To dress in something and dance in a way that made me feel sexy, desirable, and like I was the baddest out. And let me tell you, it felt amazing! The moral of this story, ladies, is if you want to cover up, then cover up. If you want to show some skin, show skin. If you feel more comfortable with modesty, be modest. If you bask in showing off your sexy side, then unleash your sexy! But whatever you choose, make sure it’s your choice. And not other people or the media pushing you one way or the other.